I Am Crippled and Bereft

Wednesday and Thursday, the sadists at D & D Sports Medicine ramped up my "therapy" program. They added 4 minutes on the accursed Elliptical Machine; 2 going forward and 2 going backwards!

Then they want me to stand on one of those short trampoline-like devices, on my BAD leg, without steading myself by touching another person or object, or letting my left leg touch my right leg or the floor; for one minute! I am not the most graceful of creatures under normal circumstances. Some have called me "accident-prone." Others, of a more malicious bent, have called me, "clumsy." Now, in my defense, I must tell you [as I have told the sadists] I have Achilles tendonopathy [the Doc's term, not mine. It means the tendon is in a state of decline] AND I have already had to have the ligaments in my Left ankle rebuilt because of repetitive injuries. Eventually, I'll probably have to have the same operation on the right one. How do I know this? Because when I'm attempting to stand on my right leg alone right now, my KNEE is more stable then my ankle!

They also added a new exercise on the "step-block." In addition to taking 30 steps forward and backwards, I now get to "dip" 30 times to the left side. All that bending! I'm also doing 30 squats now, OH JOY! They added 2 pound weights to all my leg lifts, too.

The result of all this? When I got up this morning every muscle in my thighs screamed, "You Bitch! You want us to MOVE?! Not without a LOT of pain, Honey!"

Today has been an experiment in discovering how little I could walk and still accomplish what I needed to do. I have also been mourning the loss of my Beloved Fluevogs! Yes, the Todas came yesterday. I put the left one on, by the Grace of the Shoe Goddess. And then re-discovered just exactly how high the arch of my foot really is! So, I'll be mailing them back tomorrow. But, although I must loose the boot... I'm exchanging them for these l'il darlin's. What do you think? Personally, I'm delighted! I haven't had a pair of RED high-heeled shoes since 1986. I think it's time.

And I've just struck up the friendliest little conversation with LeighAnn, the Chicago Store Manager. She has fam here in Texas. And she's just as sweet as she can be. Very helpful. I had some questions when I called to order the Todas. Then she sent a little note with my boots and some dum-dum suckers! When I called back today, she was even more helpful. Answered ALL my questions about relative widths and fits and designs. She is just a treasure trove of information about these gems of shoes.

When I loose another 30 pounds[ok,ok,maybe 40]...watch out! I'm ordering these sweet confections. I put up the pic of the black ones, because that's the color I'll order. You may need to look at the reds to see the details...those babies are scalloped at the top! ROWRR as LaP would say. Of course, I'll have to get a mid-calf length skirt that's slit to just above the knee on one side so they can peek out.

Maybe I'm not tooo bereft after all.

The Ten Commandments of Physical Therapy

I. Thou shalt not cheat whine, limp or complain.

II. Thou shalt not take thy therapist's name in vain.

III. Thou shalt not determine thine own therapy.

IV. Thou shalt not lose count lest thou shalt start over.

V. Thou shalt not covet other patients' progress as thy own.

VI. Thou shalt make appointments in advance.

VII. Thou shalt try thy hardest with all thy might.

VIII. Thou shalt cherish ice for all eternity.

IX. Thou shalt never say "can't".

X. Thou shalt get better and have a nice day.

This is on one of the TeeShirts on the wall at D & D Sports Medicine, y'all remember, the torture chamber where I am forced to submit to manipulations that cause me misery three times every week.

So far I've broken six of those commandments. The only one I can CHEERFULLY obey is VIII. I LOVE ice in a way I Never thought possible. I've had injuries before, shoot, I've had surgeries before that weren't this bad. I've torn my Achilles tendon and that repair wasn't this bad. The Evans reconstruction of the torn out ligaments in my Left ankle wasn't this bad and THAT'S a weight bearing joint.

But now...now I'm a woman with a MISSION. I have to get fully better so I can walk in my new FLUEVOGS! Yeppers, LaPhlegm has made a convert of me. When I finish this blog I'm calling the Chicago store to find out how this pair fits. If they fit snugly in the toe box, then I'll know to order a bit bigger than what I normally wear. Oh, MY, I'm shivering with anticipation. In fact, I'm signing off now, I have Boots to order.