I just posted a new entry on my other blog, No BS from a BSW. I had read a super blog over at Rickety Contrivances about Narrating Trauma. It's about LISTENING to someone who is in the ED. So, all you First Responders, check this one out.
But, I think the basic message can be broadened. Often, when someone has experienced an event that was traumatic, to THEM, they have a need to tell their story over and over. Now, I'm not referring to the Drama Queens and Princes. I'm talkin' about the honest to goodness folks who have a compulsion to talk about what happened. If you care about someone like this, listen. That's all, just listen. You don't have to offer suggestions, solutions, or even sympathy. Just let that person tell their story.
Are events still disorganized in their mind? You might ask questions to help jog their memory or offer to write things down as they remember. But once they have remember all events in the proper order, just let them tell their story.
The original blog goes into MUCH more detail and is geared towards ED workers. But if you look at it from the viewpoint of any volunteer or caring person, you can take away a valuable message.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
I've been dealing with an nuke-in-slow-motion trauma for a long time, and really, until around the time I met you, I haven't been able to work through it, fully. I think I've blurted a lot of things to people I don't know, just because I couldn't say the truth to my inner circle, least of which was the offending party. Yeah, being heard is a big part of working through all that. Despite the adage of "if your mouth is moving, your brain isn't learning," I think that when one is broadsided by circumstances or events, that sometimes the best way to grapple with it is to speak out loud what has happened and see if you can put it in some sensible context that doesn't just involve the inner thoughts screaming perpetually. Ouch! Ouch! It hurts! It hurts. Make it stop? When I see someone blathering like this, some random person, my heart goes out to them. I mean, hell, I'm so much farther along than they, and I still have oodles to work out. However, I'm making it with the help of a supportive network of friends - empathetic listeners can be more therapeutic than anything, I think.
I agree with Phlegmy on this one.
My heart goes out to him.
Post a Comment