Monday, December 18, 2006

Commercials and My Weekend

When I'm stuck for inspiration, all I have to do is run my blog trot line and see what I've caught. PhlegmFatale and LawDog are usually good for inspiring a topic. Recapping the weekend is always a good fallback for a Monday, too. So, you get a mixed bag this morning.

BTW, I've used the term 'blog trot line' before, lest any of you get the mistaken impression I actually fish...don't. I'd almost rather pull my toenails off than fish. I come from a family of fishers and hunters. Got nothing against it. I just don't have the patience for sittin' in a boat, in the hot sun, havin' to be still and quiet, for hours at a time. I'll gladly eat what you bring home, I just don't want to go catch it. Now crabbing with a net and another person is a WHOLE 'nother story! You get to walk around, and talk, and the surf and wind are keeping you cool... Yeah, I'm up for that.

I'm not gonna cover the same ground that Phlegmmy did in her blog {found in my links, Fatale Abstraction, to your right}. She has already done it so well, I couldn't improve. I will suggest you read the comments. Her readers have some wonderful ideas for truly tasteless endorsements.
I'm gonna mention some commercials I actually like. For instance, The Hummer commercial that rips off "The Great Escape". Part of me hates it that they are stealing from an iconic movie, but another part of me sympathizes with the office workers. I have sooo been there. And fantasized about escaping. Maybe if I'd been making enough money to afford a Hummer, I would have escaped!
The Coca-Cola Polar Bear commercials with Beach Boy music. I drink Coke every day, have for 25+ years. I love Beach Boys music, have since I was 12. And who doesn't like cartoon Polar Bears? For me, it's an unbeatable combination.
The Lexus commercial with the car parked at the curb dressed with a big, red bow. Two women are standing there practically drooling over it. One says, "I wonder who its for." The other says, "I did ask for something shiny." I almost hate to admit I like this one. But I think I like it b/c it underscores the "friendly" competition that often exists between neighbors. And there's just a hint that somebody's husband is really gonna get lucky, and somebody's husband is really gonna be sleeping in the guest room unless there's a jeweler's box with a big diamond under the tree!
I like the Radio Shack commercial where the guy is tellin' his wife to go to RS and ask them what he wants for Christmas. He starts anming all these different technologies for cell phones. The last one is "Blue Tooth" "What is Blue Tooth? I don't know! But they know at Radio Shack!" I really identify with that guy. And that's why I like that commercial.
OTOH, I HATE the Radio Shack commercial with all the kids pilin' into the chair and tryin to outshout each other with their demands.
And the Vonage commercials. The Dearly Beloved and I decided, based solely on the banality of the commercials, that we would NEVER sign up with Vonage.
Diamond's not a political thing. Honest. The Dearly Beloved got really lucky with me. I have never been particularly enamored of diamonds. So they just leave me cold. Seeing women get practically orgasmic over diamonds is just plain silly. Give me Emeralds and Amethysts any day. Oh, I'll take the odd diamond if it's an heirloom, and pass it on to my XX or XY offspring to be held in trust for their offspring. That's the ways it works with heirlooms, you get to keep them for a while, but they are never really "yours". You are merely holding them for the next generation.
Oh, one more commercial...that Chevy truck one. Shows all these 'things', like bull riding, ribs on the grill, huge Texas flag, and what they mean in TX, blatant appeal to TX pride. And it gets a chuckle every time I see it.

Now, my weekend recap.
Didn't leave the homestead Saturday. I only got dressed because I went outside to work in the yard. I positioned my little yard cart by the cacti, and pulled on the gloves and proceeded to removed all the grass and weeds that had grown up around my Prickly Pear. I didn't get but a couple of the big thorns in my hands. But those little suckers? WhooWHEE! You who have worked around PP know the ones I mean, the little fine, orangy-brown ones. I had to go in the house and get a pair of tweezers and bring them outside. I got all the ones out of my hands and fingers, but my left knee still has a couple that went through my jeans. I'll just have to wait for them to work themselves out. And not do any kneeling in the meantime!
Anyway, the spot is all ready for the Ocatillo I plan to bring back from Terlingua. We had planned to go in October. Then the Dearly Beloved took a tumble and the trip got postponed. Hopefully, we'll go after the holidays and I can finally get the "Ben-deterrent" planted outside the living room window.
After I was through with that task, I combed both dogs with the Shed-ender comb. It had been so loong since I done that, there were little dog hair "caterpillers" all over the front yard. Well, the birds LOVE that, all that warm fur makes good nesting material.

Then it was BATH time. I changed out of my tennies and into my Crocs so I didn't have to worry about wet shoes. The Dearly Beloved came out and helped me keep them in reach b/c his truck bed is big and high. Although the temp was in the mid to high 70's the water was COLD. Boo kept lookin' at me like I was beatin' her with a board that had long, rusty nails in it. Ben thought it was great fun to watch Boo get bathed. He didn't mind the occasional splash. When she was all rinsed off, I let her out of the bed of the truck. She shook herself several times and retreated a safe distance to watch Ben get his bath. "Who's laughing NOW?" was written all over her face.
Ben was a pretty good boy, until he got soaked. Since Labs are water dogs, it's hard to get them really good and wet to accept the shampoo. By the time he was finally wet enough to suds up, my hands were frozen! The DB helped a lot. He took one side and I did the other and we got Ben done in quick order. When he was rinsed off, he had to be tied up. The first time we gave him a bath outside, we just let him out of the truck. He promptly found a patch of dirt and proceeded to roll in it 'til he was covered in a thick coat of mud! Now when he gets tied up in the middle of a patch of thick grass.
It was worth all the effort, though. They are shiny, and silky, and smell good for Christmas.

Sunday, Boo and I went shopping for a mat to put around a stitchwork project I did for my Mom. It's an odd size, 10x5. I didn't feel like paying the outrageous prices they charge for custom-matting at Michael's and Hobby Lobby. Since matting is a skill I've never acquired, I called one of my Neice's in Houston. She does matting. I asked her if I could cut two ready made mats and cut them and put them together to make the size I need. She said, "Sure, easy!" We'll see. I may wind up asking the SNSS or his wife to do the actual deed, since I am hopelessly inept at that sort of thing. I can't be trusted with sharp objects like knives, or mat knives, or sometimes even scissors. I can do beautiful stitchwork, I just can't mat the finished project.
Later, I wrapped about 1/2 the Christmas presents we're giving out. Well let me re-phrase that. I bagged up most of the presents we're giving. I wrapped a few. The square ones. I have both a complex and a block about wrapping presents.
All the women in my family wrap/wrapped presents in the most beautiful fashion. One of my Sis-in-Laws could be a professional gift wrapper! I'm serious. Her gifts look so beautiful, it's almost a shame to open them. And my friends all wrap presents prettily. My presents on the other hand, look like an arthritic monkey was turned loose with blunt scissors and library paste to wrap the gift. I think gift bags rank right up there with Rocket ships, anti-bioticals, and velcro on the list of greatest inventions. And I even have trouble making the tissue paper look good sticking up outta the gift bag! I try to patronize stores that offer gift wrapping. I guess there are only so many wrapping genes to go around in a family in a generation, and I missed out. I say in a generation, b/c my XX offspring seems to have inherited the gene from somewhere. Ungrateful little heifer! She deliberately choose to break a five generational chain of left handed women, and NOW she wraps pretty presents!
Well, the dawgs need Iams gravy, I have to go to the bank, and grocery store, and do other errands, so I'm outta here.


phlegmfatale said...

I'm so happy to be on your trot-line. :)

The dog-washing sounds fun, actually, but I'm happy just to have a little terrier who never smells very gamey. I probably give her a bath about once a year. I love her little doggie smell - she smells like a Frito. I've been saying that when she buys the farm I'll have her hide turned into a hot-water bottle so I can keep sleeping with her. That and I can open a bag of Fritos and pee on the floor, and it'll be just like she never departed!

Lovi said...

"My presents on the other hand, look like an arthritic monkey was turned loose with blunt scissors and library paste to wrap the gift."
ROFLMAO. My throat is killing me but the belly laugh was good for the soul!

HollyB said...

PF, the Dearly Beloved and I should deprive the birds of nesting material and start saving the shed hair to make a rug of Ben's undercoat, that way when he's gone we'll have something to remember him by. But we'de have to either use Gorrilla snot to glue it together, or shellac it to keep the hair in place. That Labradorian Angora is slippery stuff!

Lovi, what can I say?, at least you didn't spew coffee on your scree and keyboard. Happy to amuse!

phlegmfatale said...

I agree that it's wonderful to think of all that pesky dog hair being recycled into bird nests. Ah, the chain of life!