Gertrude

Gertrude, the Dearly Beloved's little GPS be-yotch, isn't as smart as she thinks she is. For instance, she tried to send me down a MUDDY road a couple of weeks ago. I tried it for about ½ mile, said, “NO Thanks, Gertrude.” And got myself back on some pavement.

Evidently, GPSes don't know when a road project was canceled or the funds were transferred to a different project. Like that muddy road, WTF was that about?

Of course I had to listen to her supercilious voice say, “Recalculating.” Funny [weird,not ha-ha], when she's talkin' to ME, she has a bitchy, know-it-all tone in her voice. But when she's talking to the Dearly Beloved....she uses a very different tone. LaP calls it her “Go thither” voice.

After this trip to Terlingua...even the DB is starting to notice the differences in inflection, tone, etc when I'M driving and when HE'S driving. He told me NOT to talk to Gertrude when she was bein' “nice” thinkin' HE was behind the wheel. He had noticed the differences, too. See, I'm NOT paranoid!