Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Adventures in Not Exactly Torture...

... but I have felt things I enjoyed a LOT more.
So I went to D & D Sports Medicine last Friday and met Susan the Sadist. I'm NOT kiddin', y'all. That is how she describes herself. After she worked me for an Hour and a half on Friday, our FIRST time, I heartily agree!
She let me see "THE BACK ROOM." She didn't say anything, but I KNOW this is where she puts the non-compliant clients. There's a "therapy" table. It's padded so it looks legit. BUT, being the keen observer I am [I KNEW those investigative skills would come in handy, again.] I noticed the OVER-sized straps to keep the client secured to the table while they're punished. The machine with the electrodes is at the end of the table, so the parts that do damage can be attached to the soles of the feet, I would imagine. Oh, she is clever, that Susan!

Today she turned me over to a guy who, although he IS an Aggie, I think I could grow to dislike thoroughly. His wanted me to call him "El Diablo Rojo" here, but I told him I was going to call him "Man with feet of Clay", but now I'm thinkin' "The Gradual Economist" , or GE for short. He was even MORE mean than Susan because he implemented her Plan of Pain and Misery. I can handle the abductor and adductor stuff, and after some bitchin' I can even handle the leg lifts from 4 different positions, one of which seems totally retarted and earned me the title : "High Maintenance". BUT, I reserve the right to bitch, whine and complain when they make me do SQUATS!!! THEY HURT, Dammitt. And just in case there's any doubt in your mind...it's a sharp, stabbing pain, kinda like when you...step on a nail, or a tack, only imagine it being a really BIG nail being driven into your KNEE. Ok, NOW we're on the same page.

There are all these TeeShirts on the walls from former patients. Most of them are some type of Team shirt from different athletic programs [High School and University] around the area. I told Susan that the only sport I actually participated in was shooting. Then I asked her if I brought a shooting Tee when I was done, if she'd hang it on the wall with the others. She said, "Sure." I thought that was cool. So, I'll probably take one of my old "A Human Right" Tees up there, sign it in Purple sharpie, of course. I'm thinkin' the one of the with the Nuremberg Laws in the background and a schoolgirl [looks to be about 12-13] in the foreground. The schoolgirl has a rifle slung over her shoulder. I think it's a Garand, but I'm not sure. The message at the bottom says, "Never Again." Do any of y'all know if that's one of Oleg's designs?

But, cruel as they are, I'll be going back. I am walking better, most of the time. I don't even use the cane in the house. I do still take it with me when I'm outside, though. I'm able to work with Tip on his training. Why, shoot, I even cooked supper last night!

Don't forget...Today is Haiku Wednesday over at Sparrow's. Go enter a poem on her topic o'the week.

7 comments:

Rabbit said...

Hey Holly..

I feel for ya. I did 18 months of that on my knee.

IIRC, that's a Mauser she's carrying, and it is one of Oleg's designs/photos.

Regards,
Rabbit.

HollyB said...

Thanks for the input, Rabbit. I can ID some handguns, but I'm hopeless when it comes to rifles. I was almost sure it was an Oleg creation, too. But, again, I wasn't positive. I was also rushed for time and wanted to post before I left for P.T. I'd started this last night and didn't finish until around 1 p.m. today [Wednesday]

HollyB said...

And WHAT did you do to your knee to need 18 months of rehab? Nosy people want to know!

Rabbit said...

Oh, I slipped on a slick floor and ripped most everything in there. My foot went out at a due East direction while I was standing facing North. The rest of me went straight down. First surgery (at Good Podunk Memorial Hospital) didn't really get everything, so I had another one 11 months later up in Plano at P.O.S.M. and they figured out the cartilage was loose on the end of my femur at that time. Lessee...that was in '91...it finally quit hurting (all the time) in about '97 or so, but I know every time the barometer is going to fall.

Ask to see the funny tricks it does sometime. Fun at parties! Guaranteed to make you wince!

I'm thoroughly convinced you're going to be fine, though. Just stick it out with the exercises.

Regards,
Rabbit.

g bro said...

See? I knew you could do it! Way to go!

g bro said...

Rabbit,

I stepped in a darkish spot in an asphalt parking lot. Turned out somebody had dropped a bottle Slick 50 and run over it with their truck. In 2 seconds, I wound up flat on my back with my foot under my ass. Who knew high-speed yoga could be so much fun?

HollyB said...

Rabbit and GBro,
Both you guys make my arthritis detritus clean-up seem like a MINOR procedure. I think I need to drink a BIG glass of Shut the Hell Up!